Saturday, August 31, 2013

There Really Is A Difference

I sometimes identify myself as a "transsexual separatist," mainly to irritate the kooks like Mr. "Cristan" Williams who use that term.  But in truth, the term is something of a misnomer.  It was created as an attack on transsexuals who simply do not identify with the so-called "transgender paradigm."  The term was clearly coined by "gender fascists"  as part of a larger attempt to force those identified as "transsexual separatist" back into line.  We are actually, truth be told, more assimilationist than separatist as the goal is to assimilate into the larger society, rather than, for want of a better term, "sticking out like a sore thumb." 

This was particularly brought home to me when I happened to check out the comments made on the article by Mr. "Autumn" Sandeen (all ready discussed here) where he invents the idea that I am some sort of "activist."  The article that lead to him stalking me on Twitter, and in comments on this blog for a while, in a bizarre attempt to distract me from something I don't even do.  Amusing, but a bit of a bore after a while.

The comment was made by some guy calling himself "dawn1257" and it shows the overwhelming arrogance of some transgender extremists.

It starts off with a semi-accurate opening:
Certainly you are aware that the effectiveness of your and others activism is not what propels their dislike of all things transgender? It’s that your and others activism – they feel -publically beguiles the very term ‘transsexual’.
The use of the term "beguile" is a bit puzzling.  I would not say that that Mr. Sandeen's "activism" (I would tend to refer to it as self-aggrandizing attention seeking) charms or 
enchants anyone, and it certainly does not help time pass more pleasantly.  The term does carry an aspect of being deceptive, and in that sense is slightly accurate.  Well, actually...the deceptive part is highly accurate.

The real problems are in what comes next.  I don't know whether it is arrogantly clueless, or cluelessly arrogant....
Run-ins with Elizabeth are not unknown to me. My first was a result of her blog post entitled something like, ‘I Will Never Understand’. The premise of her writing was two-fold. First she has difficulty in maintaining understanding of why a “man” would wait twenty, thirty, or more years, get married, have children, and THEN transition. Secondly, she simply could not fathom why, after transitioning, anyone would want to remain either in that same marriage, be ‘known’ as the “Town Tranny”, and/or be open to anyone (activist) about what she perceives as only a correctable medical condition which once corrected that individual should just then ‘melt’ into society living forever as the woman, or man they know themselves to be.
Now, I admit, I did get married, for the primary purpose of getting away from my father, and I have one daughter.  I got married because, at the time, I thought I was attracted to women and because, after seriously considering transition in my early twenties, I became convinced, based on bad information, that I would not be allowed to pursue SRS.  I did some research in a university library, and the books available at the time tended to indicate that anyone who was attracted to women was not considered a viable candidate for transition and surgery.  I did not know that this was not true, and since I had no access to a competent therapist, I had no way of knowing otherwise.  And the worse part is, when I later learned that it was possible to transition and pursue surgery, I discovered I was actually a straight woman.  

But this not what we are talking about here.  We are talking about men, generally facing a mid-life crisis in the forties, fifties, even sixties, who suddenly, after showing no sign if having an issue with their "gender identity" (other than being an adult fetishistic crossdresser) suddenly decide that they are "really a woman," and as pointed out, want to stay married, and be "out, loud, and proud."  In another words, someone like, oh...say, Mr. "Sandeen" or Mr. "Cristan" Williams.  In a lot of cases, the wife has the good sense to say, "No way!," but many are financially dependent on their husbands, or feel bound by moral standards and remain in the marriage.

Now, it is not so much a matter of not understanding, as simply not seeing such a person as having any relationship to transsexualism (other than possibly suffering from the delusion that they actually are transsexual...again, we come back to the part about deception).

It is in the next paragraph where things really go off the tracks....
To a large degree her, and the others just like her, do feel animus. They feel threatened. They feel repulsed at the concept, and the coercion, and the corrupting of the term ‘transsexual’ being co-opted in sameness as transgender. It’s their sincere desire to maintain a ‘purity’ for a term that really never even existed before one prominent Psychiatrist coined it some 60+ years ago. Some of them, Elizabeth included, claim that they were in fact treated by this man. And, they may well have been. I believe they feel it to be their collective duty to protect that term with a vengeance because ‘they’ received his blessing as themselves when no one else would even consider their plight. So they have developed an aggressive desire to protect that label for only those who ascribe to, and are willing to follow the protocol enshrined from his research. In that protocol, Dr. Benjamin felt that ‘blending’ back into a normative lifestyle in the sex you believe (know) yourself to be, and have transitioned to, was paramount to being successful and ‘true’.
This shows the sort of clueless arrogance I was talking about.  First off, it is kind of ironic to have someone who I am sure clings to the term "transgender" like a drowning man grasping at a life preserver, making comments about people trying to defend a clearly defined medical term that many attempt to co-opt.  I mean, seriously, in spite of the attempted lies of Mr. "Cristan" Williams, the fact remains that "transgender" in its current usage only dates from sometime around the mid-Nineties.  The term may have occasionally cropped up prior to that, but it was not at all common.  Worse, there is the snarky comment implying that someone might make a false claim to having been treated by Harry Benjamin, and the rather false claim that we feel "threatened."  I agree, I do feel angry at the attempts to coerce me into accepting a label I do not agree with, but I also believe that Benjamin, and other experts are right that blending in is preferable...for true transsexuals.  For transvestites, like Mr. Sandeen, Mr. Williams, and I would presume "dawn1257," the very idea is anathema.  For them, it is all about being as exhibitionistic as possible.

The clueless arrogance continues...
But, the fallacy as I see it in these ‘separatists’ is that they were from a time when the science behind transsexualism, and other labeled gender variances were scattered, essentially unknown, and uncoordinated in cross-referencing. Today, like so many other physiological human conditions, much more is known -professionally. The ‘knowing’ is a resultant factor of availability of information worldwide. No longer are such issues confined for weeks, months, or even decades buried in obscure manuals, or sheltered from even public awareness.
The problem is not so much that science has advanced, it has and it has shown that the differences between transsexuals and those who might well be labeled as "gender variant" are quite wide, but that political pressure has played a major role in how things are dealt with.  A lot of therapists will now pretty much rubber stamp anyone who claims to be "trans" whatever for hormones, and if they are actually willing to give up their penis, SRS, without any real effort to determine if they are really transsexual.

He then asserts...
This is where activism comes to play. Just because something might be verified clinically as true, that doesn’t always manifest to instant recognition and acceptance of what was once thought solely as a “taboo”, a maligned, and misunderstood condition. Without the foot soldiers (activists) who in many cases are the subjects of these issues themselves, how then is a public who is ever so willing to ‘light the torches and grab the pitchforks’ instead of utilizing calm discussion and reasoned thinking on such issues going to be made known the actual truth?
The real irony here is that a lot of so-called "trans activism" involves trying to lie and make people believe that "transgender" people all are all "transsexuals" and that it is not that they are making a choice to "transgress" gender, even though that is clearly what they are doing.

Then we get to a statement that is truly clueless....
Essentially, these ‘separatists’ are and will remain ineffective in their pursuit. Some of their ‘chosen few’ will follow in their foot traffic and their mean-spirited blogging. Some of those who become transitioned will desire not to be ‘known’ publicly. Some will seek the light of determined ambition to reach out and make a difference positively in whatever manner they can. Some of us will also aid that campaign in more quiet ways, just because we can and not because we are afraid or embarrassed.
Actually, we are far more effective than he realizes.  For example, in spite of the best efforts of the transgender extremists to force us into line, including actually outright lying, we are quite able to maintain our separate identity.  In spite of their shrill claims, most simply do not buy the claim that disagreement with their extremism is hate.  Our pursuit is to blend in and live normal lives, and we do it quite well, even as they try, oh so desperately, to force us to do otherwise.

I'm not sure what this person thinks is the pursuit in which we remain ineffective.  Perhaps like Mr. Sandeen, he imagines us plotting to block their extremism.  In truth, we don't have to make such an effort.  The extremists are self-destructive, and their is a backlash coming.  Our goal is more a matter of avoiding being hurt by that backlash.


Nicky said...

The only difference for men such as Mr. "Cristan" Williams and Mr "Dana" Lane Taylor is that they are Men in dresses with a penis. They are not women and never will be. They are simply Men with a sick perverted fetish for women. They will never be female or a woman no matter how hard they try.

Dawn said...

Hi. I'm Dawn1257 and I'm a woman. Imagine my surprise while I was cleaning up some things left on the 'world of webs' commonly known as the internet when I found listed, this blog and a reference to me. I know it's been a few...ahem....years since this item had relevance yet, I couldn't help myself but to reach out to you and engage.

Apparently what I wrote as a comment in Autumn Sandeen's article struck a nerve. Sorry 'bout that. Can you believe yours struck mine too? However, you've portrayed me as clueless, ironic, and off the rails. Okay, after reading your response to it I think there are some clean-ups that need to be tended to. That is of course, if you still wanna' play. I get that you evidently don't play nice. Myself, I do try to. I can be as cordial as the next person, or as nasty as the last. It can be your choice. My preference is - nice. I hope yours would be to.

Just Jennifer said...

"Struck a nerve?" No, not really...more like "struck my funny bone...." If by "don't play nice," you mean "presents the facts without holding back, or engaging in the political correctness demanded by transgender kooks," you're right, I don't. But no, I don't "play." I am very serious about all this.

You claim you are a "woman." So tell me, have you had surgery, or are at least planning on it? Or are you like Mr. Sandeen....a member in good standing of the "They Will Take My Penis When They Pry It From My Cold, Dead Fingers Club?" And if you have had surgery, by are you hanging out with those who spend a great deal of their time reminding the world that yes, they really are men, and don't won't anyone to forget that, but still demand that they be called "women?"

Dawn said...

Hello Jennifer,

Well, to be serious, I don't play either. This is really nothing to play around with, in my estimation.

I detest being asked (by anyone) "what's between my legs", be it those who are transgender, transsexual, right wing extremist, religious kook, or just the casual acquaintance. Serious people do not ask such private questions. However, to help bring your concerns to allay, I am planning my long time surgery as we speak. I have an appointment set for September 4th to finally put an end to being transsexual. Will that information suffice?

No. I don't spend time all. I did several years ago. But, I found what the true meanings of assimilation were. This girl don't play that! Recently, I visited a forum which I used to frequent looking for some more information about my upcoming doctor (it's always good to go prepared). It nearly made me want to vomit with the "do I pass" threads. Actually, I couldn't bear to read them.

No. I was done with them not long after I wrote that comment on Sandeen's blog. Since then, I have found that living is much more real than dreaming. It's what I do these days. I live. I live in a binary world. One that likes to know who they are dealing with, without the political nonsense which thrives within the transgender arena.

I do take up for them when I encounter hateful people (mostly on right-wing blogs and idiot participants in their comments).I'm a liberal, what can I say? I also take up for positions that are somewhat leaning to the progressive side of things. So, focusing on issues of those who are transgender is Activism is not something I want any part of.

Dawn said...

Jennifer, did my response to your inquiry not come through?

Just Jennifer said...

Yes, I can see that, but when someone insists on being "out, loud, and proud" as transgender, they are inviting that sort of inquiry. That is one reason I reject that label, and why I prefer what is sometimes derisively called "stealth."

Yes, that information suffices. And congratulations on having a date. It does make a big difference.

Ironically, my views came about largely from having worked in an HIV prevention study that targeted "transgender people." I dealt with a broad range of people, some of whom were stealth, and many who were quite out. I saw the harm done by people like Sandeen and Williams. I realized that there is a very real difference between transsexual, and transgender. I transitioned and had my surgery to be my true self. Ironically, they do as well, but their true self, and my true self, are very different things. I am a woman. No a trans woman, just a woman. I have no desire to be "out, loud, and proud," as I have no desire to be seen as anything other than a woman.

I have taken on my share of right wing bigots. But I find it is pretty much unnecessary. I am far more concerned about the harm done by kooks like Sandeen. Like you, I live in the binary world. Some of my friends know my past, others don't. And some, I don't know if they know are not. If they do know, they also know I prefer to not deal with it.

Dawn said...

Jennifer, I appreciate your sentiments. I agree with your desire not to be 'open' about your past. You are 100% right that there is a distinct difference between transsexualism and being transgender. The two are NOT related at all. I don't want to be known as "the tranny" just as I wouldn't want to be known as "the diabetic", or "the leper". My medical condition does not define me. I simply want it corrected and be forever done with it just as someone who has cancer wants to be cured only to live a long(er) and happ(ier)y life.

For me, I guess my inner soul just hates to witness hurtful things being said about anyone just because they are different. It's why I engage from time to time these idiot RWNJs. The hard part (and I know that my reputation was already tarnished because of my previous involvement in activism) is being characterized as 'just like them' when they find that I have a.....history. My challenge these days is to take up a defensive posture without making the effort look like it should include myself. It's a hard thing to do. Mostly though, I bypass negative comments made, or articles written. Sometimes I'm not even sure why I read them at all. I simply do not want to be castigated even if it's anecdotal.

What I've found in being 'quiet' and living as a member of binary society is that initially there was a cost. A cost in relationships both in business and in personal lives. I've learned to accept from this, my mistakes and simply move on. It's rather amazing how you can really progress in life when you focus your efforts on the same needs and desires 99.9% of people are also focused on day in and day out instead of the fallacy of transgender activism which simply wants to use you up and spit you out. Then, have you completely reliant upon their encirclement and entrapment in order to simply survive. Not to mention the utter dissolution of what ever level of respect you once held by your peers. And, not to mention the very real societal disturbance created for want of changing every facet of a binary culture.

"Some of my friends know my past, others don't. And some, I don't know if they know are not. If they do know, they also know I prefer to not deal with it."---You and I are on the same page.


Just Jennifer said...

It appears we agree more than we disagree. I honestly don't understand people who seem to cling to their past like that. I never served in the military, but if I had, I certainly would not want to trumpet it like some do. I was amused when Kristen Beck, the former Navy SEAL turned transgender claimed to be twice the man that Mike Huckabee is. Uh....okay. I won't argue that at all.

I have been regularly attacked by the likes of Sandeen and Williams for having these sorts of views. They expect, and even demand that "transwomen" have to be very public about being trans. Sorry, but no.

Dawn said...

Yes, I believe there is more agreement between us than not.

Having been one who - in the beginning - was duped into believing that 'openness' was the only way to make a difference, I can tell you, and I can tell all that openness only puts a target on your back and shots will be taken at every turn. Those 'shots', are well deserved. A sad consequence of this? Just look at Jazz Jennings now.

This poor child will NEVER have a normative life. She could have. But, the Trans hierarchy have latched onto her parents and the 'celebrity' thing took over. Mark my words. This child is headed for a life of misery. Such a shame too.

What I think I've proved in my own life is keeping your head down, working hard and knocking the transgender 'chip' off your shoulder, leaving them all in the past makes for a measure of success and acceptance by even those who are/were your harshest critics well earned.

Yeah, I didn't much care for Kristen Becks statement either. However, I was less than amused. Statements such as that only serves to remind people of the twisted transgender dogma. It's a contradiction that cannot be undone. Deservedly so.

I suppose what irritates me the most when it comes to people like Kristen Beck and Caitlyn Jenner and a host of others is not necessarily about 'what's between their legs' (that is , unless they publicly proclaim that they will not seek medical correction) is retention of and absolute disdain for - at the very least - correcting their voice. It drives me nuts! They might 'look' like women on the outside, but, male comes screaming through when they open their mouths! Makes me want to gag....ugh! When it comes to late transitioners (like myself) making your voice a focal point of binary inclusion is paramount to any measure of public acceptance, failing in this leaves the unequivocal impression of being - 'only a man playing dress-up'.