tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post5414300809272356084..comments2023-10-12T08:11:38.983-07:00Comments on Just Jennifer: What's Wrong With Just Being Normal?Just Jenniferhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comBlogger12125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-24912051980674622082017-07-17T23:47:07.783-07:002017-07-17T23:47:07.783-07:00Sorry, but "transgender" came out of the...Sorry, but "transgender" came out of the crossdressing community. It was pushed by people who were not transsexuals.<br /><br />And yes, it used to be that most gender therapists tended to specialize in that field. Increasingly, there have been people who have built their practices on telling people what they want to hear. They don't probe.they don't talk to people who know the patient, they don't delve into the patient's history, they just label anyone who asks with whatever label that person wants. I was lucky. I saw a couple of therapists who didn't take that approach. In fact, my surgery had to be approved by a committee, rather than just having a couple of letters and going off somewhere that is more interested in money than getting it right.<br /><br />It does not always lead to suicide, but there are a number of people who clearly should not have had surgery, who show severe dysfunction. They tend to become very outspoken against people who have had successful transitions. It makes me angry when people pursue this path. These people are unable to assimilate as women, and demand that everyone else be like them, and be "out, loud, and proud" so to speak. They condemn people being "stealth" or "assimilating," applying the term "truscum."<br /><br />Again, the problem is therapists are pressured to not ask too many questions. If a child is really transsexual, they should be placed in a school where they can assimilate instead of being an object of attention. But that is not what transgender want. They don't want to be able to go into a rest room and no have people know. They want to force acceptance.<br /><br />The issue is not just transitioning late, but transitioning late after a lifetime of being a successful male. Of showing no sign of being transsexual until suddenly deciding they are a woman. When someone has a 20+ year career, as a man, in the military, or served as a Navy Seal before deciding they are really a woman, something is totally off.<br /><br />And yes, these people do great harm. Just Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-43006496930251097282017-07-17T19:14:39.319-07:002017-07-17T19:14:39.319-07:00I think most people knowledgeable on LGBT issues w...I think most people knowledgeable on LGBT issues would disagree with you that transsexual is not part of transgender or that transgender was a term dreamed up by crossdressers rather than one used by people who don't fit in a gender binary - I certainly do.<br /><br />I see no evidence that there are "an increasing number of quacks who will simply rubber stamp anyone who asks". Perhaps you can research it, get it peer reviewed and published. Then we can discuss reality rather than your personal opinions.<br /><br />If people at the age of 40, 50, 60, or 70 want to change genders and live as who they want it to be, what's it to you? How are you harmed by this? Its really none of your business. There simply aren't significant percentages of people who've undergone sex change surgery who regret it.<br /><br />I get the impression you'd like to greatly restrict who can get this surgery. That may prevent the rare instances of people who feel it was a mistake but it would also hurt the far greater numbers of people who want to transition for which it would not be a mistake. We have to ask "Which way will help the greatest number of people and harm the fewest?". I think if you think about this objectively you can't help but acknowledge that the system as it is now is much better than one that is more restrictive (perhaps much more so?) that you would seem to prefer because people you don't know who aren't hurting you are doing something you don't approve of.<br /><br />It is very rare that "surgery leads to tragedy", studies show the vast majority of people who undergo sex change surgery are happy with their decision and happier after than before. It seems that what others do is a very important issue to you and it makes you very angry that people have sex change surgeries when you do not approve of them doing so. I'm sorry you feel that way.<br /><br />There may be parents who push plant the idea that the child should be the opposite gender, encourage it, and push the child to go along but I believe that would be extremely rare and the mental health professionals whose cooperation is required to block puberty and or get approval for sex reassignment surgery would weed them out.<br /><br />I could be wrong, maybe you can prove it eventually (but I doubt it) but I think you are getting all upset over an imaginary problem because it somehow makes you feel superior to some people transsexuals you don't approve of or transgender people you don't approve of. Perhaps you feel that these sorts of people some how reflect badly on you and that is why you're angry at them. That's a shame if that's the case.<br /><br />I think you're the one with the problem, not the transsexuals who transition late in life or the people who identify as non-transsexual transgender people.<br /><br />Ultimately this matters not, I see this is so important to you that you're not going to consider what I say or others say or that you might be wrong. You apparently have an emotional need for this to be the way you see it.<br /><br />I hope you can overcome your anger to people who do you no harm and find the happiness in life you deserve.<br /><br />Best Wishes,<br /><br />PriyaPriya Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00576423655825077725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-87902631162530312902017-07-17T18:36:56.646-07:002017-07-17T18:36:56.646-07:00I had to start moderating because certain people t...I had to start moderating because certain people took advantage and would post things that were not okay. <br /><br />No, transsexuals are NOT transgender. Transsexual is a medical condition that is extremely rare. Transgender is a term that was dreamed up by crossdressers in an attempt to blur the lines. It is a social and political construct that has no objective meaning. Anyone can call their self transgender. To actually be a transsexual, you should be diagnosed by a qualified, competent, and ethics therapist. Sadly, there are an increasing number of quacks who will simply rubber stamp anyone who asks. This often leads to tragedy when people get approved for surgery that is not right for them. And transgender is a misnomer. Gender does not change. For many years, a small, but obsessed minority of psychiatrists and psychologists have tried, in vain, to cure transsexuals of their "delusions," They have tried all sorts of therapies with zero successes. But, at the same time, we have people who claim to have suddenly, at the age 40, 50, 60, 70...realized that they have "always" been a woman, after a long history living as a perfectly normal male, who engaged in things like he military, sports, and other masculine pursuits. Some were crossdressers, but really never showed any real sign of having a female gender.<br /><br />I am suggesting that their are parents who plant the idea that the child should be the opposite gender, and who encourage it, and push the child to go along. It is not about avoiding stereotypes, but about pushing the child to change the stereotypes he or she adheres to.Just Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-37865107195299012112017-07-17T12:59:32.780-07:002017-07-17T12:59:32.780-07:00Thank you for posting my comments, I was a little ...Thank you for posting my comments, I was a little to hasty in assuming you read it and didn't want it seen.<br /><br />I agree that transsexual is a different term from transgender but there is overlap between the two. Transgender is a continuum that includes transsexual individuals as well as those who feel themselves as not fitting into sex role stereotypes based on sex assigned at birth. Many transgender individuals will never seek sex change surgery or want it and may think of themselves as somewhere between the genders rather than being a different gender than the one assigned at birth. Transsexuals are more rare than transgender people but once again, absent random samples of the general population yielding a statistically significant number of transsexual people you are not in a position to say how generally how rare it is. Once again, your personal experience in person and online has very little to say about the culture of this group - it just isn't scientific.<br /><br />When you say trans is trendy, that it has become a status symbol to have a trans child and that some parents try to encourage it to become celebrities, its important to define what you mean by "trans" - do you mean transsexual (wanting to be the gender one identifies with ) or transgender (merely having characteristics that don't fit stereotypes). If your suggesting some parents try to encourage their child to be transsexual, I don't believe that. If you're suggesting some parents try to encourage their children to not be restricted to gender stereotypes, for boys to perhaps try playing with dolls or girls to try playing football yes, I can believe that happens to a degree and I don't think it is necessarily a bad thing.Priya Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00576423655825077725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-42683273042684873832017-07-17T12:47:37.191-07:002017-07-17T12:47:37.191-07:00No, I did not delete your comment. I have ONE rul...No, I did not delete your comment. I have ONE rule about comments, that they do not invade my privacy, or that of others. But, I do moderate every comment. If someone violates the rule, the comment never sees the light of day. Well, I do also remove anything that is spam, or attempts t promote porn, and such. I don't always have time to immediately approve every comment. I do have a life. Try no to jump to conclusions. It only makes you look foolish. And try reading some of the comments others have posted I am not like some bloggers who will remove anything that disagrees with their narrow views. I simply deal with what is claimed, and refute it as needed.Just Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-27221183528855442362017-07-17T12:41:30.389-07:002017-07-17T12:41:30.389-07:00Or, you just have to be exposed to the culture tha...Or, you just have to be exposed to the culture that permeates this group, both in person, and online. And right now, though it is beginning fade, "trans" is trendy. It has become a status symbol among some to have a trans child, and I very much suspect that some parents actually try to encourage it so they can become something of a celebrity. True transsexuals, and I know some hate that term, are extremely rare. And completely different from transgender, which is a political and social movement.Just Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-89319317987143549642017-07-17T12:19:26.501-07:002017-07-17T12:19:26.501-07:00Really? You want to be taken seriously and appear...Really? You want to be taken seriously and appear open minded and fair and then you delete my comment about the importance of random samples and statistically significant number of samples?<br /><br />I thought more of you than that Jennifer, I see I was wrong.<br /><br />I came to your blog from another blog that criticized you and linked to you. I thought you had some good points although I disagreed with others. You tried to make the case that they were wrong and you were right but now its apparent you aren't an honest person and you're more interested in appearing right than you are in actually being right.<br /><br />Shame on you Jennifer.Priya Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00576423655825077725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-16415374495891653642017-07-17T11:34:41.658-07:002017-07-17T11:34:41.658-07:00If you worked in research then you should be aware...If you worked in research then you should be aware that in order to draw conclusions about a population with reasonable confidence they are correct you need a random sample of that population of a statistically significant number of people (1000 is a generally accepted number). Your experiences are a convenience sample and I suspect number a lot fewer than 1000 and you have not applied any scientific analysis to accurately quantify your experiences in a way that eliminates bias.<br /><br />Admittedly, this is a problem with most research into LGBT people, particularly trans people - there are so few of us it is very difficult and expensive to get a truly random sample of a statistically significant number of people so most research into LGBT people is based on convenience samples.Priya Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00576423655825077725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-40245096673365809292017-07-17T11:25:27.760-07:002017-07-17T11:25:27.760-07:00There is a great deal of pressure on researchers t...There is a great deal of pressure on researchers to maintaining "political correctness." Speaking the truth can get one attacked. I have worked in research, and I have seen that sort of thing. Some are always at the ready to attack anyone who does not adhere to the party line. Just Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-88503316324635536992017-07-17T11:22:41.450-07:002017-07-17T11:22:41.450-07:00I don't necessarily disagree with you that its...I don't necessarily disagree with you that its a disservice to society to promote the idea that simply saying "I am a woman...today" magically changes a person.<br /><br />But if you were to read up a bit on statistical analysis and research aimed at characterizing groups of people you'd realize that your opinion based on years of your own experiences is in no way a scientifically valid way of drawing conclusions about populations of people. Statisticians vary a little with some saying anecdotal evidence is evidence but the weakest kind of evidence and others saying it is not scientific at all. You're on very shaky ground when you equate your opinion with reality.Priya Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00576423655825077725noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-52095678503015899072017-07-17T11:15:16.917-07:002017-07-17T11:15:16.917-07:00I had similar experiences. I recall once, I was a...I had similar experiences. I recall once, I was about to go into the men's room in a Walmart when an employee stopped me, and said "Ma'am, that's the wrong bathroom." And more than once, I had someone look a bit panicked that a woman was in the men's room.<br /><br />And you have a right to your opinion, but mine is based on years of observation. While some adopt that term out of ignorance, or because of pressure, I have found that those who prefer it want to make sure that people know they are "transgender." And they often cling to their past lives as men with an amazing tenacity.<br /><br />No, it is a disservice to society when the idea is pushed that simply saying, "I am a woman...today," magically changes one. Just Jenniferhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15011627273687180475noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8544621986610962495.post-23452103498259181252017-07-17T11:08:45.223-07:002017-07-17T11:08:45.223-07:00"Personally, I did not enter the ladies room ..."Personally, I did not enter the ladies room until I felt reasonably sure that I would be accepted as a woman, and not cause distress. That, simply put, was because I was a woman, and had concern for other women. The vast, overwhelming majority of those who identify as transgender are men, and like men, they think they have privilege that they really don't.".<br /><br />Like you, I did not feel a right to use the ladies room and didn't until I was confident I'd be accepted as a woman and not cause distress. I came to this realization a while into my transition when dressed androgynously I'd go into the men's room and have men look at me, do a double take and look surprised. I realized then that I was being perceived as a woman and it would be risky to continue using the men's room. I felt I had to use the ladies room at that point but didn't feel right about it until after my sex change surgery.<br /><br />I find myself agreeing with some of what you say but other things I think you go too far and don't really know what you're talking about. For example when you say "The vast, overwhelming majority of those who identify as transgender are men..." you really have no way of knowing that, you're just asserting your (odd to me) unsupported opinion as fact. You do a disservice to society when you do this.Priya Lynnhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00576423655825077725noreply@blogger.com